J'étais clairement paniqué, mais je ne le montrais pas, je devais me montrer fort pour pas que Feldt panique plus qu'elle ne l'était déjà. Au fond de moi, j'étais carrément incontrôlable, paniqué, angoissé. J'avais peur, pour Feldt mais aussi pour les jumeaux. Et s'ils avaient des soucis de santé par ma faute? J'me le pardonnerai jamais. Nan, never. Et du coup, j'étais genre très perturbé et je ne comprenais pas ce qu'elle disait quand elle parlait de leur dire... Leur dire à qui ? Dire quoi ? "Everybody…" .. Que je prenais pour "mes plus proches amis", et Elios, évidemment. "Just call Elios and tell him, please…" Je hochais la tête, et je me rendais compte que je n'avais pas le numéro d'Elios, mais non plus de Reaghan, sa meilleure amie. "Where's your phone ? I don't have Elios and Reaghan's numbers." Je retardais le départ pour l'hôpital mais si je devais les prévenir, il me fallait leurs numéros impérativement. Dès qu'elle me l'avait indiqué, j'étais parti le chercher et une fois en main, je revenais dans l'ambulance, prêt à partir pour le centre hospitalier. J'envoyais alors les sms à Elios, Reaghan, Hendrix et Briony.

You didn't even know why this was happening. All you knew is that you went into labour at a moment you weren't supposed to and now you were on your way to the hospital. Well at least, you were in the ambulance in front of Elios' villa, waiting for Alex to call my best friends. I needed them near me, even if things weren't going so great right now, especially with Briony, you needed her by your side for this. "Where's your phone ? I don't have Elios and Reaghan's numbers." You usually always had your phone on you, but because of all the things that happened, you just left it on the living room table. "It's in the living room, on the table. Please just text them, I can't handle this any longer. " He then left the ambulance, leaving you alone with the paramedics that was trying to give you some infusions. "Are you feeling dizzy? Or do you have any unusual symptoms?" You shook your head, not really wanting to answer with the fact that your heart was racing inside your chest you had a lot of difficulties breathing. Alex came quickly back and you reached out for his hand, not saying anything, just letting out random screams, when a new contraction was coming.

Contacter tout le monde, c'était dans mes cordes. Mais quand je n'ai pas les numéros de certains, ça devient assez difficile. Du coup, je lui demandais où se trouvait son portable afin de récupérer les numéros dessus et contacter les personnes voulues. "It's in the living room, on the table. Please just text them, I can't handle this any longer." Je hochais la tête et je me précipitais hors de l'ambulance pour aller chercher tout ça. J'en profitais également pour fermer la villa avec les clés récupérées dans l'entrée et je revenais, mobile en main, dans l'ambulance afin qu'on y aille. "I'm taking care of it, don't worry. It's gonna be fine.. ok ?" L'ambulance se mettait alors en route et on partait tous à l'hôpital. La regardant, je m'occupais en même temps d'envoyer les sms à tout le monde... Elios, Briony, Hendrix et Reaghan. Yep, ils allaient tous être au courant que Feldt allait donner naissance aux jumeaux deux mois avant la fin du terme de la grossesse... Et god, qu'est-ce que je me sentais coupable. Une fois terminé, je mettais les portables dans mes poches et j'attrapais sa main afin de montrer mon soutien inconditionnel.

Being rushed into hospital wasn't really as you excepted your pregnancy to be and especially not giving birth. But now you couldn't change anything, everything had already started and there was no going back. Your babies were going to be born two month in advance because of your choices in life and if anything happened to them, you would never forgive yourself. Alex came back after getting your phone and texted everybody. "I'm taking care of it, don't worry. It's gonna be fine.. ok ?" You nodded slightly, trying again not to scream out to load but that didn't really work. Your best-friend took your hand and you continuously squeezed it to try and contain the pain. "Thank you…" It's been a while since you hadn't talk or you hadn't had the feeling that you belonged somewhere, but him getting mad at you, showed you he still hold onto your friendship and it was your fault if you went looking for comfort in Andy. You arrived very quickly at the hospital and they took you directly into the block, and now it was going to be the longest hours of your life.